Worried About a Loved One’s Drinking During the Holidays? 7 Ways You Can Help
Worried about a loved one’s drinking during the holidays? Having “the talk” can be successful.
Updated 11/19/ 2025
At Sanford Behavioral Health, we get feedback from the loved ones of previous clients this time of year. They tell us about the difference between holidays in recovery versus the years prior when their loved ones were in active addiction. We hear, “It is such a relief. I used to get so anxious about holiday family parties or evening school functions,” or “I never knew if I could trust my partner to turn up, or if they did, how they would arrive.” In fact, there is a predictability to addiction. When it comes to substance use disorders, family members can foresee a disaster in the making. And the holidays, with all the hoopla, seem like an invitation to bad behavior.
Worried About a Loved One’s Drinking?
Over the years, we have written many articles about how to speak to a family member when worried about their drinking and how to integrate into the extended family during the holidays in early recovery. We have also given tips on how to say “no thank you” to a cocktail when at corporate and family parties. We’ve advised on quelling anger when a family member in recovery or an empathetic loved one bans alcohol from family functions. These articles are our most viral content, which suggests that most people are seeking advice on two topics under the heading “worried about a loved one’s drinking.”
I. Practical tips on how to preempt embarrassment, disappointment, or disaster and address a loved one’s problem drinking.
II. Guidance on paving the way with family, friends, and colleagues when new to recovery, especially this time of year.
We have assembled a library of resources for those embarking on family recovery and relapse prevention. Remember, even if your loved one is not ready to get help, YOU CAN GET HELP. Armed with advice from the Sanford experts, we hope your holiday season is healthy, happy, and without worry!
I. Addressing a Loved One’s Problem Drinking
!. How Do I Talk To My Partner About Their Drinking?
One of the questions I get as an addiction counselor with an advice column (Ask Rae) is, “How do I talk to my partner about their drinking?” In fact, some of Sanford Behavioral Health’s most viral articles are about the subject of alcohol ruining relationships. When someone in the household is misusing alcohol, it impacts the entire family system. [Read More]
2. The Myth of the High-Functioning Alcoholic
Individuals who appear to be high-functioning may be in denial of their alcohol dependence. However, if someone drinks heavily, secretively, or despite negative consequences, it is going to catch up with them eventually. According to the US Guidelines, adults of legal drinking age “can choose not to drink or to drink in moderation by limiting intake to two drinks or less in a day for men and one drink or less in a day for women when alcohol is consumed.” For a functioning alcoholic, these guidelines may seem laughable or impossible. [Read More]
3. Damp or Dry? The Trend Toward Sobriety
The sober, curious, or “damp lifestyle” is the choice to be mindful and practice moderation when drinking alcohol. Avoiding binge drinking and overconsumption of alcoholic beverages is a key component of this lifestyle. The concept is not new, although the trending phrase “damp lifestyle” is. The self-help group Moderation Management (MM) has been around since 1994, allowing continued but controlled drinking. MM is a “lay-led non-profit dedicated to reducing the harm caused by the abuse of alcohol.” According to MM, 30% of those who join their group go on to abstinence-based programs. [Read More]
4. Craft and Family Treatment in the Addicted Home
Readers of the previous articles also know that I am committed to introducing a healing method for family and friends of people with SUDs. This method is CRAFT (Community Reinforcement and Family Training). It is a strategic treatment method employed by family and friends of people with SUDs engaged in treatment. It also improves the quality of life for families and friends, whether or not the person with an SUD enters treatment. [Read More]
II. New to Recovery Tips and Tools
5.The Holiday Season is Upon Us – Recovery Tools and Tips
Those of us in the recovery community face a distinctive challenge that adds to our holiday preparations, planning, and stress. Both family members and loved ones in recovery have thoughts and memories that might come back and haunt any reasonable positive anticipation. As an addictions counselor and the long-time facilitator of the Sanford Behavioral Health Family Program, I have heard it all. [Read More]
6. The Sober Holidays Q & A
If you or a loved one is experiencing their first sober holiday season, you might worry unnecessarily about saying “no thank you” in the “yes please” season. We want to put your concerns to rest by answering some of the questions you are probably asking yourself. One of the difficulties of recovery is saying no to triggering events; addiction is a yes disease. The holiday season, with its obligations and disruption to routine, can mess with one’s resolve. [Read More]
7. Myth Busting – Non-Drinkers Are Boring
Do not get me wrong. I am not saying everyone should stop drinking or even that we should banish alcohol from the social calendar. After all, 90% of Americans can, as the alcohol ads caution, drink responsibly. However, for the whopping nearly 10% of us who cannot, I would like to shake up the paradigm that a great party must include spiked punch and intoxicated patrons. [Read More]
If you or a loved one feels your recovery is at risk or is struggling with addiction, eating disorders, or a mental health condition, don’t wait to change your life. Click the link below to speak with an admissions specialist about our programs.
