What Men Want (from their Addiction Treatment)
What do men want when they check in at an addiction treatment center? According to Rae Rabideau, Sanford Manager of Clinical Operations, most men enter treatment to “learn how not to relapse”. The details of their stay are not something they’ve really thought about, and the continuum of care and the future is unknown. […]
Gracefully Welcoming Change: Recovery in an Ever-Changing World
Change. Many of us struggle to navigate it gracefully. To create meaningful change, we have to do things differently. We must engage in some self-reflection. And practice self-awareness. And admit our shortcomings… It’s a lot of work. I could draw a metaphor, here, about the changing seasons (it’s finally starting to feel like spring […]
Dear Rae: Why Can My Boyfriend Drink More Than Me?
Dear Rae: I am a currently a Junior and I have been drinking heavily for my entire time at college. Mostly beer, but we also do shots. Lately, after a night of partying, my hangovers seem to be getting worse. If I’m honest, I don’t feel that great most of the time… but it […]
Honoring the Unique – The Life Story Project at Sanford
I visited Seattle recently, and stayed in a hostel for the first time. When I got home, I struggled to describe my trip. “My perspective is a little different now,” I said. Different names for the same place… honoring the unique, dynamic, peculiar, and predictable In truth, all of our experiences shift our worldview […]
Clever Addicted Brain – Sabotaged when Contemplating Change
Revised January 2026 My favorite scene in the movie Jurassic Park doesn’t end well. The Australian park ranger is hunting raptors, and one of the creatures rattles the fronds in front of him. While he prepares for the kill shot, another raptor sneaks up from behind. The ranger is eaten alive, but not before uttering […]
I Knew I Was an Alcoholic Long Before I Quit Drinking….
I knew I was an alcoholic long before I finally put the alcohol down. I knew this because I became emotionally dependent and would use a drink to satisfy everything. Coming home from work I would slam the bottle of wine on the counter and tell myself that I deserved a drink. Whether I had […]
Dear Rae: What Level of Care is Best for My Wife?
Dear Rae: I feel completely helpless. My wife has been drinking heavily for years, but she has a good job and is very active. She runs three times a week and we have a pretty big social life. Here’s the problem – lately, she seems to be drinking more and it is impacting her quality […]
Dear Rae: Is My 15-Year Old Using Alcohol & Drugs?
Dear Rae: My teenage son has begun to worry my husband and me. He is sullen and non-communicative – which is very new behavior in our house. We are a close family and he is our only child. In the past, John was open about school, friends and outside activities. But recently, he has been […]
What is This Thing Called Addiction RECOVERY?
This is not a trick question. Nor does it have a “right” answer. However, there is a wise old saying by Yogi Berra that sums it up, “If you don’t know where you are going, you’ll end up someplace else.” And with addiction recovery, it is up to each one of us to define […]
Gratitude, Thankfulness and Recovery in the Real World…
I went away to a retreat last weekend. I was feeling a bit “rusty” in my recovery and decided I could use a tune-up. One of the things that hit me like a gong at a Buddhist temple while I was there, was the fact I had stopped doing a daily check on the […]
