When the Booze Soaked World is In Your Face…

girl looking at booze soaked world


Sometimes it’s just in my face a whole lot more. You know… the fact that I live in a booze soaked world. Some days it’s just more evident than at other times.


Most days I get to potter about my community, interact with my friends, spend time online, look after my kids, and feel normal and content. Not have it rammed home to me that a huge bunch of my fellow humans do something I don’t.


These days are great.


Then there are other days…

Other days I’ll be slammed with images of boozy parties on Facebook, watch TV programmes full of people drinking, hear stories of people I know celebrating and getting drunk, or have houseguests around who like to tipple at 5pm. These are the days when I get reminded that unfortunately at this point in time there are more people on the planet who drink alcohol than there are people who are sober, and I’m in a minority.


These days can be hit or miss.


Sometimes I can handle it fine and just shrug off the booziness without letting it get to me. If I’m in a good phase of life, feeling happy and strong and firing on all cylinders then I’m like, “So others are drinking – whatevs.”


But if my mood happens to be low when the booziness gets in my face then I’ll probably get a bit bummed out. If I’m hormonal or something bad has gone down or I’ve been a bit bored and scratchy lately then having the boozy stuff appear will sting just that little bit more. And I’ll be like, “Am I boring? Am I missing out? Am I secretly losing at life?”


Two Variables…

There’s two variables here. The variable of whether the booziness of the world is in my face or not. And the variable of how I’m feeling inside of myself at any given time.


Only one of those variables I have control over. And only one of those variables matters.


What matters is how I’m feeling inside myself. It’s doesn’t matter what the rest of the world is doing. The world does what the world does. I need to just do me.So if I’m noticing boozy parties on Facebook and realize I’m feeling a bit stung by that I won’t spend time or energy wishing things were different. Instead I’ll look at myself and question what’s going on for me. I’ll recognize that I’m not feeling strong and good, and I’ll do something about that.


Is Everyone Partying But Me?

I won’t rail against the state of the world or worry that everyone else is partying without me. I’ll recognize that I need to be kind to myself and perhaps up my self care a little. I’ll do some at-home yoga (yes, I have become that person) or I’ll go out and buy myself some ridiculously expensive herbal tea or I’ll force myself into nature, or I’ll simply send myself some love and compassion and sweet messages that say “you’re ok, you’ll lift up again, things ebb and flow, don’t worry about what’s going on out there”.


baloons in pool for sober party


And sure enough I do lift up again. And the next time I see a boozy party on Facebook I don’t care a jot. Because really, who cares what others are doing with their lives? I know what I’m doing with mine.


I’m being brave and amazing and staying sober forever. That’s what.


Lotta Dann drank alcohol steadily and heavily from the age of 15 to the age of 39. She stopped drinking only when her habit had reduced her to a sloppy, miserable mess and it became apparent she had no control over her intake. She wrote her way sober with the help of an anonymous blog called 'Mrs. D Is Going Without', which started out small but slowly turned into something incredibly large and powerful. Her memoir 'Mrs. D Is Going Without' was published 3 years after she stopped drinking. Now happily sober, Lotta spends her days parenting and running a busy household, promoting recovery through her blogs and social media accounts, and managing the Living Sober NZ website. She lives in Wellington, New Zealand with her husband, three sons and a Labrador puppy. Lotta's book 'Mrs. D Is Going Within' was published in June 2017. And her newest book, 'The Wine O'Clock Myth: The Truth You Need To Know About Women and Alcohol' is available now. .